I want to write about praying and how to ask for what you want from a divine source, because I have watched so many people fail in their requests. Now this is a topic on which there is always more to learn, so this is only my observation and experience so far. But I have experienced so much failure and success in my own life and seen both in so many other people that I can say there is a science of prayer which is well worth exploring.
1. If you’re really desperate just pray for help.
The biggest mistake most people make is to pray from a position of desperation. I personally find that the best prayer when I am really desperate is totally simple: “Please God (or whoever you want to address) help me.” That is all I ask for until I feel better. When you feel really desperate there is very little point in asking for anything specific (money, healing, solutions to problems). You have lost any sense of solutions being possible and all you need at this stage is to establish some connection with the Divine. Get the line open so a little light can shine into your situation. If you keep it simple at this stage it works very fast and you can feel better within seconds or minutes. Once you feel better you can start to get more specific.
2. Ask directly and keep yourself out of the way.
A very common way of praying is to ask for help to do something or get something. “Please help me make more money.” “Please help me find a job.” “Please help me find a relationship.” It’s OK to ask like this but I have found that the results usually come very slowly. It is much more powerful to ask directly. “Please bring me $3,000.” “Please pay my rent.” “Please get me a job.” “Please bring me a relationship.” There’s a simple reason why this works better. When you have to do all the work yourself it is slow and complicated because you do not know much about how to get a relationship or money or a job. If you knew already you would not be praying for it. But whoever you are praying to (God, your Higher Self, Energy, Divine Consciousness, the Light or anything else) knows very well how to arrange it and can do it directly. If you let them get on with the job they can find ways we could not even conceive of. We tend to get in the way when we try to do it ourselves which slows everything down. Being direct with prayers and requests for help works much faster for me.
3. Avoid subservience
I have not found it helpful to have a subservient attitude to the Divine. I prefer to see it as a partnership, a two way communication process, where we both play our parts and show up fully for each other. I ask for what I want because that is my part and because I can. My requests are fulfilled because that is the nature of life and the divine order of things. It is not a question of what I deserve or whether I am a good enough person (and it took me a long time to figure that out). For me by far the most important thing is to keep developing and exploring the partnership, and that is virtually impossible if I do not feel worthy of it.
Of course prayer is not only about getting stuff, but I find that getting stuff by asking a divine source is a wonderful and magical way to do it. It makes me feel so grateful. If I am honest it doesn’t feel like prayer in the traditional way at all. It is more like a conversation and that’s what I love about it. It’s alive. It’s not a formula. It changes all the time. And there are constant surprises.