Let’s talk about the real secrets of personal growth

Girl telling a secretWe are often promised we can find out the ultimate secrets of life if we buy this product or that course. It’s powerful marketing because it hooks into our deepest insecurities as human beings. But through more than 20 years experience of personal and spiritual training and development I have found the real secrets don’t need to be packaged in a product. They can be revealed right here, in full, without any need to promise anything or sell anything or hook you into anything. It is better to know these in advance because you will spend your money more wisely and be more prepared for the process.

1. It takes time and patience.
I have experienced some miracles and seen many other people who have experienced miracles in some area of their life, but those same people can experience deep frustration in another area or at another time and get totally stuck, just like everyone else. I could have written one of those amazing testimonials about receiving a miraculous amount of money out of the blue. It has happened to me several times. But I also experienced financial failure after the miracles, so they proved that miracles can happen, but they are not the whole answer. Only the glowing testimonials get published – which is fair enough – but it is important to realise that behind those miracles lies a lot of time, patience, frustration and all the other ups and downs that are part of learning anything worthwhile.

2. It is easiest and quickest to learn with someone who has mastered their subject.
This is obvious – it would be hard to learn a language with someone who didn’t speak it. But often in the area of spirituality and personal development we are encouraged to teach what we want to learn, and this is not a bad thing. There’s a contradiction here, so I will briefly explain my experience of this because I have been on both sides of the contradiction.

Wherever I have gained mastery or lengthy experience in an area of life there is a transmission of energy that takes place that allows the student or client to access some of that energy and receive results directly. So for example, if I am asked for help with health any advice I give will not only provide some information to the person but will directly improve their health as well, usually immediately.

If I do not have that kind of experience there are two main ways I can access knowledge, by channelling or from other people (via books, films, hearsay etc). Channelled information (this is the experience where you don’t know the answer from personal experience but it comes to you in the moment) is powerful, inspiring and always true if you are channelling from a good source but may not be as powerful for the client as mastery because the direct transmission is not as strong. This means they get good direction and instructions but they don’t necessarily get direct results. Information from books etc has by far the least value, and can often be simply misleading. I have learned that you have to experience for yourself whatever is written or told to you by someone else before it has real value. Words can be very misleading, but experience is powerful.

So if you have access to a ‘master‘ to learn from (ie someone who can demonstrate in his or her own life whatever they are teaching, and has worked with others to achieve the same) that would be your best choice. Second choice – go for someone who has access to a good channel (you should be able to ‘feel the truth‘ emanating from their words). Last choice is someone who has studied the books but not put them into practice very much in their own life.

3. Everything that appears negative in life is really positive.
This is the biggest ‘secret’. It is the most transformative knowledge I have ever come across and I have witnessed it transform people’s experience of life on a daily basis over the last 15 years. It is easy to say the words, although most people are not even aware of them. Putting it into practice through all the ups and downs of human life is the real challenge. This is a secret that is easy to share without needing any marketing tricks. As in anything valuable in life it is not the words that count here. The real truth of the secret lies in mastering it and that takes time, patience and a lot of experience. There is no shortcut to this secret except simply accepting that it is true, especially when it appears not to be.

So there we have it. 

I think all my secrets have been written here now. Every time I think there is some secret I am missing I come back to these three. And quite remarkably, when you accept that it takes time and patience and you accept that what appears to be negative is actually positive you move very fast. It is when you resist these that life feels slow and stuck. Then you need the help of a good teacher or mentor.

It seems to happen to me about every 6 months that I get that feeling of wanting to wave a magic wand over my life and transform everything instantly. It’s usually when I am undergoing a major change and I’m finding it a bit uncomfortable. Then the promise of a new ultimate “secret” is very appealing. And whilst I would never want to discourage anyone from looking for shortcuts in personal development – after all, why not do it quicker if you can – I can honestly say that the greatest speed always seems to come from the same old secrets, constantly reapplied in different areas of life. Sounds boring? But in reality it is truly enlightening. It is one of the most reassuring experiences in the world when you discover (again and again) that everything you thought was wrong with your life was absolutely perfect. That everything you thought was negative is really positive. That everything you are resisting is actually helping you.

That is the magic wand, the ultimate secret, the priceless knowledge –  and it transforms your life in an instant, just like all the marketers promise!

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